things are still going well. Our getaway was nice. We have had some arguments over the past week, but nothing large. H wanted to have a little commitment ceremony together in our back yard just us. He wanted us to burn his journal together, and both write down things we wanted to leave behind. I was impressed that he initiated this and followed through. The things he wrote about leaving behind were deep and thoughtful, and meant a lot to hear.
He also has said a lot of things about his behavior during S that I've been so glad to hear - about how he was running away, not listening to anyone, demanding things, etc. It's been a refreshing self awareness to hear. Especially without it being in the context of a shame spiral - just actual reflection and learning.
I still get sad thinking about some stuff, but feel in a solid place overall and that he is all in, open, and expressing and utilizing his tool kit to talk to me about stuff when it is upsetting. I've definitely put in a lot of practice on active listening, being more vocal when I appreciate something or feel supported, coming to him for support when I am sad, being more level headed in heated discussions, making more of an effort to show him things are OK and that I love him. I feel a lot more stable/solid and like a team - not prioritizing my personal independence over all things, which definitely negatively affected our marriage in the past.
