I know what I did was wrong, I only see it now though. Watching the Tedx Talk on SSM was the real eye opener. It was us to a T.
When my W told me about this, she said she was "broken". I told her she wasn't and that I owned at least half of any blame. I admitted that I hadn't been giving her the emotional connection she needed and understood why she wanted to fill that need elsewhere. And I do understand. That is why through all of this I have not gotten mad or raised my voice even once.
I haven't even thought about a video game since this started. I threw that crutch away like it was a bomb. I have been doing nothing but focusing on reading these forums, watching videos about MR problems and possible solutions. As long as there has been no PA, I really would like to save this. If there has been a PA, then it's already over. I have accepted this and as soon as I did, it felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.
I agree, I wish I had given her a child as well. Without that major resentment, I think we would have a better chance, and even though I am 46 and she is 39 and we technically could, with her starting a new career, she doesn't even want to start over with a child now. Plus we will have a grand baby in 3 months. Maybe that will give her the baby fix she needs. Who knows.
