Persistent Endurance (Part 8)

[ovrrnbw]

Hey Curtis,

I feel bad for you. I've been there and done that. It is painful. But it probably is not as painful as it was a year ago, right? Do you think you are getting stronger and smarter?

W said her GF is being manipulated and controlled and she knows because OM3 did it to her. She said he always wanted her to be available for him at his mercy and that it was a massive time suck to text him throughout the day and night.

You sat there and listened to all of that?

W said she couldn’t see it when she was in the relationship and no one could help her see it.

Lol, relationship? You validated this lie and made her life easier by allowing her to avoid the truth of her actions: she was a married woman involved with other men.

Will my W ever open up to me and share her innermost feelings?

Who gives a rat's behind? Every time you talk to a woman in a romantic situation (and vice versa for our ladies), you should be deciding if she is worthy or not. Not everyone passes the test.

The day I left W said “To be blunt after not living together for a year, I think we could use a break from each other.” I replied “You’re probably right.”

The appropriate response would have been to show her the door and say "bye Felicia".

I asked if she was back in contact with OM3

Goddang dude. Again? Just tell her you know, or better yet take action and throw her out. She was evasive again? Not shocking. There are going to be a million things that remind you of OM regardless of whether or not you are with your W. Detach!

I'll say this Curtis, you've never really gone NC with her and moved on. I would do this immediately. As a person who clung hard for a long time, I feel your pain.

Your W said that you only wanted her when you couldn't have her, is that true? I'm genuinely curious.

But guess what, your W is the same way. You want her back? Let her go. Really, do it. Go NC, boot her out. You may get full custody given all the crazy [censored] and AP's she's had at the house. The stats show who is most at risk for this so let your W go live on her own.

When I got here I had the belief that you hang on to your marriage no matter what. You said for better or for worse and your word is your bond. But I have really softened on that position in the last 2 years.