I would also like to comment to ovrrbnw's post. I know that you are stating not to be friends with her, but one of the issues she is complaining about is that she did not feel we had an emotional connection. If I want to show her that I am able to have that deep emotional connection, the best way to do that is to show her that I can do it as a friend. I am going to talk to my coach about it tonight and come up with a strategy.
Yea I hear ya. This would be a good 180 for you, so learn to validate her feelings when she shares them and how to be a listener to women. But do not be a friend. I have zero women friends. I had some acquaintances over the years through work and social groups, but no friends. You have to tread carefully here especially since there is another person involved. It's hard to make that deep emotional connection right now with her wanting a divorce and an OM. Settling for "friends" certainly won't get you there.
The friend doesn't get the date, he doesn't take the girl home, the friend just gets to watch things happen. Is this making sense?
Is Leni your DB coach?
H 34 W 29 BD 3/12/18 Divorce Busted Spring 19
It is not things that bother us, but the stories we tell ourselves about things.
