Hi Pommy,

I am new here, but have been following your situation and have so much empathy for what you are going through. We have very similar timelines with our separations, and even had brief reconciliations on the same day(s).

The rollercoaster is so real and I am so mad at myself for allowing myself to feel a little bit of hope for those moments. Only to be dashed again and back at square one. Navigating his confusion, while also trying to deal with my own confusion on our M.

I am finding that with each blow (momentary recon, discovery that the old EA is back again), I am bouncing back quicker each time. I am definitely not as detached as I would like to be, not by a long shot, but I am making baby steps.

For me this week, I am proud of how fiercely I protected, loved and mothered my children. I have felt partially absent (as a mother) as I navigated my own emotional holes, but this week I did a good job as a mother. I have found that not seeing him every day has been good for me... I get my balance back for at least a moment and the clarity allows me to really think about whether or not I really want him back. Seeing him every day was too hard to get that clarity.

Sage