KML... I cannot fathom how tough things must be for all of you right now. There is such discrepancy between different areas and who knows why. In Canada, the east got hit way harder than the west and there is some thought that it might be due to Spring Break happening in Quebec a week earlier than in other parts of the country. Our provincial government has been doing daily updates and reminders on television since all of this started. Anyone not adhering to social distancing was pretty much shamed into compliance. They did start to fine people but that only happened a few times in more heavily populated areas before people started to really figure it out. Now physical distancing is just pretty much a way of life. My kids are adapting to online school like champs and get their social contact virtually or from a distance. I live on Vancouver Island and there is now only one identified case here (and it's a big island!!) and that poor person is in the hospital. They emptied the hospitals to prepare for the influx of patients that never came so elective surgeries are starting up again next week apparently. Brook is a nurse and he has actually been working less than usual. Also a factor is that ferry service to the Island was greatly reduced so people just aren't coming here unless they have to. I think that has really helped as well.
Re: my break up with Jack. He was definitely not tossed aside in favour of Brook. I have no idea why Brook reached out to me when he did but it was long after I had decided in my mind that my relationship with Jack had run its course. I had predicted that us sharing space was going to be a make or break move and it definitely was. He tried really hard to settle into "domestic bliss" and I know there were parts of it that he really liked but, at the end of the day, we both realized that he probably isn't stepfather or partner material at this stage of his life and there are too many differences between us for it to work long term. Jack loves me because I am really good to him and I don't think he has been in a relationship with someone like me before. He also thinks of me as his best friend and missed me a lot the last time we split. I think if we can manage to stay friends, we will both be very glad we made this decision. I had actually been thinking of ways to broach the subject with him for a week or two when he finally brought it up. I told him every time I heard the song "Scared to be Lonely", I would think of us and that probably wasn't a good sign. There is a reason that, after a year, I haven't met his family and that I don't really talk about him to my friends (other than the really close ones) or think of a future with him in it. We both know, on some level, that this is not a "forever" relationship and I know that calling it quits was a good decision. I know it because the second we made it, it felt like a 1,000 pound weight had just lifted off my shoulders and I've been really happy ever since. Also, since he left, we have had very little contact and I haven't really missed him. That, to me, is also a sign we made the right decision.
When I think of the future, I think of being with a nameless, faceless guy who is around my age, is probably a dad (so he gets my responsibilities), has similar values as me and wants to retire in ten or so years and spend a lot of time traveling. Now Brook is exactly that guy "on paper" but I have no idea if he is that in real life or if our emotional attraction to one another will translate into a physical one. The good news is that, unlike last time, I'm not getting carried away with the whole romantic idea of first loves becoming last loves. It would make a great story if it happened but I've really taken a step back from the idea. I have also let him make most of the effort this time around. I think he can probably sense that because he is the one initiating about 95% of our conversations. And...he finally suggested we get together face-to-face and said it is "long overdue". He doesn't quite have his work schedule figured out for next week but he says as soon as he does, we can pick a day for him to come down for a visit. I joked that as soon as we decide on a day there would be a rock slide on the highway preventing him from getting here...lol. Guess we will see...
