You might need an antidepressant instead of just anxiety medications. Other things to do for depression: exercise (as good as Prozac in some studies), get enough sleep (melatonin can help with falling asleep), yoga or meditation, B vitamins, and those daily affirmations I talked about earlier. Also do a little sunbathing as vitamin D is important for Covid and will help your mood.
I'm on an AD but I'm doing lots of other things wrong. Not eating real food, not exercising, staying up too late, and not going outside. I'm also trying to tough it out by not taking the anxiety meds and it's an epic fail. I just can't do without them right now. I'm taking .25mg 1-2 times a day and taking the weekends off. I've also been eating real food and going to bed on time.
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Your brain tends to assume the most horrible possible outcomes (yes, that's a feature of depression) but it is really counterproductive to run with those things. So you need to work on NOT BELIEVING the BS your brain is telling you about your future right now. You wouldn't listen to a friend telling you those terrible things right now, would you? So why listen to that depression monster in your brain?
Multiple times a day I'm reading inspirational books especially when my brain tries to kill me. You'll laugh but last night I read a few pages, threw my hands up in the air, ugh because wallowing is so much easier than taking action. I saw it. So I got up and cleaned the kitchen. My brain started killing me again so back to the book I went. It's weird I get it, I see it, I understand it, it's almost like a bad habit. Read a few pages (I'm underlining things to make this easier) and got back up. Cooked dinner and vacuumed. At this point I had a handle on the depression. Took S19 to the auto parts store to get new bulbs for the cars and came home to watch tv with D17. Went to bed on time.
Would have worked fine except D14 called me at 5:30am. Teenage drama and needed an adult. She chose me isn't that wonderful?? In my clarity I realized I needed a new attorney so that was the first thing on my agenda. My computer at work wasn't working (fun) and I was shaking. Took my sliver of a pill and pulled it together. Got an email and we should be getting 3 kittens next week. Everything is going to be fine isn't it??
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Yes your kids will likely get more financial aid with you divorced. Community college is a fine place to start. Living at home during college is probably a better option right now anyway since college dorms are germ factories. Your kids may be more motivated knowing they don't have dad's trust fund to fall back on. I worked my way through college as a waitress and ended up in medical school.
We're all adjusting we'll get there.
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Put these up on your bathroom mirror and read them out loud every morning: I am smart and capable. I have a bright future ahead of me. I can provide for myself. I am on an adventure. I am resourceful and creative. I am better off without ex and have happiness in my future.
This is kinda what I'm reading in my 2 books (same author) that I cling to. Have one in my purse and one on the coffee table. Was texting my support group leader yesterday. I am truly trying. I've come a long way in a year and I believe I will continue to grow. Won't be easy I see but like I always say I'm not giving up.
**warning I may be off the rails tomorrow. That's not me though it's just my brain in panic mode that's all. I'm scared**
