speaking as someone who's also struggled with the idea of "closure," I think it's important to note that closure does not have to be "have a R talk, pour your hear out, and THE END."
Sometimes closure is just you finding acceptance in "the way things are." Whether you want to close that door, or leave the door open, it's all the same. Accept your decision in the short term, and revisit it every now and then (not daily or even weekly. but take baby steps) when you feel ambivalent or if outside circumstances change.
Both #1 I agree with May. If you don't want to be his friend, just gradually talk less. make yourself busy. Although I can imagine if I tell my H "sorry, I can't chat right now I gotta go paint my toenails" He'd certainly flip. LOL. maybe I'll try that next time.
