Yeah - when my ex met his current wife he was 50 and she was 31. As he was a fit surfer the age difference physically probably didn’t seem too much. And my MLC ex could hang out with her and her friends and pretend he was still in his 30’s himself.
I don’t think she’s a gold digger, fwiw, although I’m sure the exotic vacations were a plus. His duplex is very simple, only expensive because it’s one block from a famous surf break in a very wealthy part of town. He’s made it nice in a beach pad kind of way. He’s very charming and I think she genuinely cares for him.
But now he’s had two shoulder surgeries and two lumbar back surgeries in the past couple of years and is currently suffering crippling chronic pain (and sounds like depression, which he is prone to). His retirement plans have been thrown off by this - the original plan to take early retirement then work per diem 2-3 days a week to have the same salary as before retirement is suddenly now just his pension, so half what he was expecting to have. And while that still ought to be enough for him to live on, especially with her salary too, it’s not enough for her to retire or cut back too. And not enough to spend without some kind of budget. (Yes, a pretty comfortable budget but no impulsive $5,000 guitar purchases allowed).
So now he’s probably grumpy, depressed, disabled - all of a sudden looking like an old man at 60 instead of a “god among men”. It may be giving her a glimpse into the future. Ten years from now he’ll be 70 and she’ll be 51. She’s a cute Asian chick who will probably age well and have plenty of offers from other men if she wants them.
I honestly hope she stays with him and cares for him, so he doesn’t fall on my kids. Hopefully he’s not picking at her like he did with me. Cheating on her seems less likely in the short run, although it’s in his nature so anything is possible.
