I have trouble with many things haha, but this one in particular has been hard to deal with. If she made a decision to move on and find happiness, then so be it I suppose. However, here we are seven months later, and we are still married. A few weeks ago when the bill payment thing came up and she broke our 6 week streak of no contact she even told me most of the time she is just sad and/or mad. It's just frustrating, if she wants to move on, then go for it, I'm not stopping her, but she sure seems to just do nothing, and she doesn't really give off the impression she is happy either.
Hey js -
Just popping in with a word of support. This isn't easy - keep focusing on you.
Unfortunately, you have entered the twilight zone. Time means nothing here. Common sense means nothing here. Logic means nothing here. 7 months is nothing. 6 weeks is also nothing. A year ago I was where you are and W was on her way out the door to Dtown. If you had asked me if I would be where I am today, I would have told you you were crazy.
Yet here I am. IHS for 15 months, 20 plus months in.
How did this happen? Well - here's some advice: stop chasing after someone who is running away. It's not a good look.
Choose whether you are standing or not.
If you are, give yourself the best possible chance for saving yourself (note: yourself, not your MR) by DB your [censored] off.
Focus on you. Do nothing. Say nothing - do not initiate conversations at all unless it is an emergency. Get out of the way, remove yourself from the equation as much as you can.
That's what they want. Let them figure things out. That's what you can do to help them, and it will greatly help you to get calm and grounded and figure out what YOU want too.
