H: “do you want to open up your own credit card?” Me: “I already have one.” (I walked away)
Few mins later
H: “yadayada about money.” (Asked me something but I honestly didn’t understand what he was saying.) Me: “hm? Sorry I’m not following. I’m just waiting on your papers.” H: “yeah I know I’ve just been so busy at work. Yadayada” Me: nods (I went on doing my own thing around the house)
H: “we should go visit my parents, maybe next weekend?” Me: “sure.” H: talking about where to eat then etc I listened.
I’m getting better at this. It is so easy to start babbling and end up engaging in small talk out of habit. Well, I think I improved a lot today. When your emotions settle and with enough detachment, it is possible. Others who are struggling with this- learn to get used to the uncomfortable silence. You do not need to fill gaps in the convo with words. If the WAS stops talking, and no answer is required from you part, consider the conversation over.
With that said, I still struggle sometimes with wanting to give him a last heartfelt speech about his MLC/our M. What exactly would I say I don’t even know. I feel like I just wanna get things off my chest before our D is finalized (well it hasn’t even begun actually). But I shut myself down when I get those urges. My gut tells me nothing good will come out of it. Seriously, this type of STFU training exercise helps when dealing with children too. I have been blowing up less at my kids for their misbehaviors lol.
