[quote] Do you think your porn addiction is why you had a passive attitude about being in a SSM? I mean, the disinterest in sex really started before you were even engaged, and you went ahead with the wedding. I guess I am one of those people who want to understand the "why". Of course finding the solution is important, but if you don't know why you did certain things, what's to stop you from repeating it?
That was definitely the reason, or at least the catalyst. I had not had many girlfriends or partners before W, and this was my first LTR. After the traumatic incident, I turned back to p**n only intending for it to be a temporary fix. Instead it became the status quo and I (and we) didn't know how to get back into our prior routine or break out of the SSM. She tried and I resisted. And time just kept passing and passing while she built up resentment and I compartmentalized and pretended like nothing was wrong.
Originally Posted by sandi2
Which rule would that be?
Not really a rule, but I know some here say don't be friends with her. Maybe this is more geared toward certain situations not like mine.
