Was he really there for you though? This racist difficult guy, was he the super caring person you would hope for to take care of you in such a situation, or did he just manage to keep things running?
I ask because you have accepted so little from this guy, it's hard to picture him being the companion one would really want at your side during a crisis. And I think you might not know what that kind of loving care would look like?
I went into labor with my 3rd child at 11pm. It was a work night for H so I told him to go to bed. My babies come fast so I was worried. It was incredibly lonely to labor by myself but I didn't want to bother H so I let him sleep. I timed the contractions and kept questioning myself as to when to wake him up. At 3am I couldn't stand the pain anymore so I woke him up. I was 5cm by the time we got to the hospital and I was once again kicking myself for not going sooner because it took a bit to get drugs.
On the bad injury he kept things running but I did make my needs small. There were days when I wouldn't get a shower for 2 days because he had to work. Once I couldn't stand it anymore so I put on a swimsuit so the girls could at least wash my hair. I'm kinda ashamed to admit that I continued to have sex daily with him but it was my idea. I thought he did a good job but maybe I don't know what loving care would look like.
Quote
And stop wandering off into imaginary cancer futures, ok? Should such a terrible thing happen (and hopefully it won't) you will get good care and you and your children will make the best decisions at that time. Stop horribilizing.
As you see from my stories I really don't like bothering anyone. I've already researched the top diseases of older people and they are all mostly preventable with diet and exercise. Falls are a big thing and I got a taste of that when I tripped and ended up with a titanium radial head. It about killed me with PT but I got 98% of my range of motion back. I'm proud of how strong I was because omg that hurt.
