I’m going to give you a scenario and it’s not to sound mean, but to get you to think and perhaps refocus.
You speak of dating another man. Imagine that man was so embroiled in his STBXW’s and everyone of of her moods and emotions set his moods and emotions off and made him spin? Would you want to date a guy who was still so affected by his ex W?
When you stop worrying so much about your H and more about you and your feelings aren’t dependent on him, you will be open to a HEALTHY relationship. Right now, your enmeshment in your ex would not bring a healthy relationship to the table not be fair to the person you are dating.
If you really want a healthy R in the future, you need to keep continuing to get healthy and not have your emotions dependent on your H
I'm a year out from BD after 30 years together. We've been together longer than I've been alone and well it's a lot to process kwim?
I talk about R's to remind myself that his isn't all roses and unicorns (I kinda need this right now) not because I want one. I've had a man in my life for 40 years and the thought of having one right now makes my skin crawl. My support leader says this is normal as well as I heal from abuse.
