And then it was over.

[BlueSea]

LH19 - Everything you say makes sense and describes what I am feeling to a T!!! I feel like I am in a maelstrom and drowning, and your words are like a raft that I can see but can not pull myself into to save myself - no matter how hard I try. I hate myself for being so weak to willingly allow him to put a lead leash on me and control this situation so easily. Now that I see this conclusion - how do I act on it? what do have to do to get my bearings straight?

Job- Thank you for the clarity on how to handle the day to day. "If he doesn't talk to you, then leave him be. If he asks you a question, answer in very plain language, do not elaborate on the topic." - Yes, that I can do! Thank you for this instruction - I feel like this will allow me to stop walking on eggshells around him. Why am I complicating things? When you say it, it is very simple. I ordered the book, Solo Partner, I will read this and the articles to try to learn how to detach - even though right now nothing is processing.

On the together counseling - I don't know what to do - I leave it in the DB counselors hands to decide the best approach. I will talk to him on Monday morning on our personal session and ask.

All - I appreciate the support - life just [censored] right now (Boeing layoff on the horizon, fractured foot, 86 yr old mom is sick, kids are following me like ducklings with questions I have no answers to - and my mind is complete mush). Add, the isolation of quarantine is hard. I know it sounds much but honestly this board is my only reaffirming sane touch point to understanding how to get thru this. I am so sorry that the best advice is coming from those that had to live thru this already. Please please don't leave me.