Just doing some quick catching up...it's the tail end of the LONG weekend and I know if I wait until tomorrow -- when I'm back at work and all, then I will forget stuff or get too caught up to post....
Was at class all day Friday then met h to go to a party at his parent's house...not much to report there although his mom and dad (who have had their bumps in recent years) seem really good right now and are totally enjoying each others company!
Saturday I went into town early then out to lunch with dad while h went to the bball game with a friend. we had a mellow evening at home just watching some tv and bringing chinese food in. lots of positives just hanging out together.
Sunday we went on a hike and then h did homework while I did quite a bit of gardening...we went out last night for drinks and food. h was super cute asking me out on the "date". I forget how this came up but while we were hiking I commented that he had been really thoughtful about something for me...and he said "that's a good example of reaping what you sow...it's your thoughtfulness that taught me how to do it". I'll take the compliment! I was listening to Dr. Phil last week and he was saying how keeping a "benevolent spirit" towards your spouse is critical no matter what your sitch...I like to think that this attitude even when the crap was hitting the fan made a positive difference!
Today we went on a KILLER hike...h told me that I'm in good shape -- that I look great and that I was kicking his A$$ setting the pace! Then more homework for him and more gardening for me...it's gonna take me ALL summer but this yard is going to look GREAT! Relaxed this afternoon and now h is off with a friend for errands and dinner. I'm just about to eat...went shopping after he left...looking for lounge chairs (no luck) and ended up with a bikini instead!
Should be a good week...I've got lots of work to do at work (duh) but it's a short week (yah) and next week is even shorter! (another intensive class!).
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Quote: went shopping after he left...looking for lounge chairs (no luck) and ended up with a bikini instead!
I'm jealous! There is no way I can put on a bikini these days and go out in public.
Quote: and he said "that's a good example of reaping what you sow...it's your thoughtfulness that taught me how to do it".
This is so awesome Sage!...and...your H is right!
Quote: Dr. Phil last week and he was saying how keeping a "benevolent spirit" towards your spouse is critical no matter what your sitch...I like to think that this attitude even when the crap was hitting the fan made a positive difference!
Ahhh...once again you write the perfect thing for my current frame of mind! I've been looking for an answer and getting myself all confused about what my "spirit" towards my H should be. Thank you.
Quote: I'm jealous! There is no way I can put on a bikini these days and go out in public.
Well, miss...I know from reading your thread that you're smaller than I am ... so don't get any false impressions! I'm heading out in my bikini as SAGE -- flaws and all -- NOT as Cindy Crawford or Demi Moore!
Quote:
Quote: Dr. Phil last week and he was saying how keeping a "benevolent spirit" towards your spouse is critical no matter what your sitch...I like to think that this attitude even when the crap was hitting the fan made a positive difference!
Ahhh...once again you write the perfect thing for my current frame of mind! I've been looking for an answer and getting myself all confused about what my "spirit" towards my H should be. Thank you.
Confession time...that note was actually included for you -- jeez -- how passive aggressive! (Sorry!). I've been confused about how to post on your thread lately...(just the last few days) because my advice seems sort of counter to a bit of what you've been getting and I couldn't figure out a way to offer mine without confusing the issue...simply put, I DON'T know what might work or not in your sitch...but I DO know (and liked being reminded by Dr. Phil) that benevolence is probably never a wrong idea!
***************** H had school last night. I stayed at work doing homework then ran a few errands. He was home pretty early and declared that Tuesdays would now be "surprise beer night" since he parks his car (to go to school) near a liquor store that has lots of cool, unusual beers! He brought one home and we split it (+).
Spent a lot of cozy time talking (+) and watching TV. H had done a ton of stuff around the house yesterday (+) so I offered up lots of thanks for that! It's amazing to me how involved he is now in doing stuff around the house for us.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
Lots of positives for you...good stuff! Love the "try a different beer" idea. How cool!
Quote: Confession time...that note was actually included for you -- jeez -- how passive aggressive! (Sorry!).
You, bad girl you!
Don't worry about it; I know EXACTLY what you mean and I'm glad that you posted this message here for me as I needed it. I've been having a hard time asking you lately because I know you don't subscribe to that approach.
I, too, get confused as to what will work. My H is a stubborn little one. Also, I don't think that I'm not ready to do what was suggested plus I don't think it's in me. It's perfectly solid advice but I don't know.....
If you've stopped by, you know that I sort of tried it yesterday and didn't feel very good about it. I felt so bad that I called back and apologized. Last night was the the first night in while that he didn't stop by. BUT, he did stop by earlier and greeted me; although not warmly. SO....I'm still confused but I'll continue on my path and you're right; benevolence is never a bad idea. Cathy puts it as "kill them with kindness".
Thank you once again my friend.
Anyway, even of hijacking your thread. Hope you have a wonderful day and good night at school.
I forget how this came up but while we were hiking I commented that he had been really thoughtful about something for me...and he said "that's a good example of reaping what you sow...it's your thoughtfulness that taught me how to do it". 
BUT, he did stop by earlier and greeted me; although not warmly.