Wooba gosh your H really does sound in a fog. Your resilience through all this is incredible but must be so painful. He doesn’t seem to be able to cope with marital /parental responsibilities but is not craving any “new life”? It’s just enough for him to remove himself from the home and return when he feels he can cope? Is he having IC?
It’s ok to want to crawl under a blanket. It’s perfectly ok. I don’t have any words of wisdom but am thinking of you {hugs}
M:49 H:49 T:20 M:18 D:16 D:14
EA: Feb 2019-May 2020 Separated: Mar-early Aug 2020 H asked to reconcile: Jun 2020 EA relapse: Oct/Nov 2020 Recon #2: since Nov 2020