I am okay. We are still in lockdown. The kids are getting more into a routine - out on a morning walk with me, some homeschool, some time alone doing reading / art / computer while I work, helping out with chores. I am expecting a lot more from them - both of them - when it comes to helping around the house, and I think it is doing them good. They are bored and resentful and sometimes bicker and sometimes it's just too much and we have very bad days, but most of the time it is okay.
H is at work more or less all the time. He is exhausted and is like an automaton most of the time ,but he has not emotionally withdrawn or detached and he is not taking his stress and exhaustion out on me or the kids. There are times when he is snappy and grumpy, and he will still lock horns with Eldest now and again, but the tension seems to be coming out of that relationship now both of them know I won't have anything to do with their drama. H is using what spare energy he has to help with the homeschooling and around the house - I don't think he's taking care of himself that well right now, but to be honest, with his work, and my work, and homeschool, and things being the way they are, we're just doing our best.
I feel very blue a lot of the time. I am in effect a SAHM which I never wanted to be and didn't sign up to be. I am still working at home, but not doing that well at it, to be honest. My boss is very understanding and the summer is a quieter time for us, but we're in the middle of crisis planning and so there are a lot of zoom meetings to attend which I find totally exhausting. I am attending my book group and seeing my friends and doing a few other things all electronically, which I appreciate and which does help, but like most other people, I am bored and lonely and stressed.
H will be okay in his job and is looking forward to a promotion this year. He's in medicine so there's no chance of him being made redundant. I am in a kind of related, adjacent sector but it is likely that there will be redundancies. We could live on either his salary or mine - we don't have an extravagant lifestyle and save a lot so we have a buffer - so I feel lucky and I am trying to concentrate on being grateful.
