There’s something about dealing with the unjustness of it all. It’s not right.
My ex discarded me and his life was not upended at all. In fact he was able to buy multiple houses,cars, motorcycles etc and I was left trying to decide if I needed groceries or gas more because I couldn’t afford both.. I had to borrow money for rent.
Exactly!! I'm apologizing to my kids for serving pasta....again and my sweet, wonderful kids tell me "mom your dinners are fine, you don't need to be spending money right now".
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It was so difficult to stop comparing my experience to his. To this day (and I’m 5 years in), I still struggle with it. But shiny things don’t make a good life. They don’t. I have no relationship with my ex but from what I gather based on how he has reacted this whole time, it’s not all roses for him.
Yep I'm there. H has more than me but since the kids say he looks like death I'm guessing (for now) life isn't all roses. I do beat myself up saying he'd rather do that than stay married to me? Ugh I know I know.
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I feel so grateful to have peace in my heart. My life post-marriage has so much more meaning. And when those feelings of jealousy creep up about the financial ease and the hardship I was thrown into as a result of his actions, I just tell myself “the best revenge is a life well lived.” And it helps to rid me of any energy I continue to give to him.
In the end I will have a lot less money but more joy at least that's what my IC says. My kids used to lock themselves in their rooms and now we hang out together now that H the grouch is gone.
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I share that with you because it helps to know you are not alone in this. You are not alone with your feelings about the matter and I get how much it stinks but it will be OK.
Yeah the part where he has a shinier life stinks. I hate my house. Absolutely hate it so as soon as I get home my mood drops. I don't know if my girls are lying to make me feel better but they say H's house had potential (it's nice) but it's just gross now. I took the better furniture and all the housewares. Told D14 he'd get new stuff but he didn't. He doesn't have garbage cans, never opens the windows, and never cleans up the pet messes. They say his house stinks.
