I honestly do want to give him space to figure himself out, therapist said in the beginning that issues were fixable and just needed tweaking. We could both do a better job respecting each other and meeting each other’s needs, better communication, etc.
For him to pull the plug and be done suddenly shows me he has his own thing going on and I’m not even angry because when I pull myself out of the situation I can see with the other factors in his life (unhappy with self, not MLC but I do see some same behaviors) unhappy with work, and therapist even said that if all other parts of his life are out of whack then coming home and having home be out of whack too then it can be too much.
One of the things we are both needed to work on with therapist is stop pushing external control on the other. I am working toward releasing that. It is a genuine goal of mine that I believe is important for my self growth. That’s the part that is interesting to me is that because he is pushing the ball forward and telling me how things will be split and making executive decisions without input that he isn’t doing the real work he is supposed to be doing with Therapist. He is still very much trying to control me and our situation.
Which with that being said I wouldn’t want him to come home today anyhow because he isn’t doing the work for himself and I deserve better than that. In some ways I find it a little weak to walk away from a problem because tackling it requires more pain and effort. I have self dignity at least that I am putting the work in with Therapist even if he is running away.
