I really don't know your history just yet, but I'm sorry you're experiencing those feelings. Just wanted to pop in for support and say you aren't along in feeling them. I know I've had similar feelings in the past. While I'm probably better off in the long run than my ex is financially, its been a struggle the last few years watching her buy a house and move in with her bf. I basically started over from nothing, while she kept most of the few things we had. Also, with the help of her bf she was able to get a house. He wasn't the guy she left me for, but started dating him a year after BD, less than 2 months after we separated physically. They're still together, they have a house and i'm sure post on fb an image of a nice, perfect life together. Remember, nothing is as it appears, I doubt your ex is really that happy. Even so, eventually you wont care one way or another.
Early on I had some intense feelings on not feeling good enough and wondering why am I living in a shitty apartment, taking care of my kids on my own, single while they seem to have things so good. I think for most of us the lack of consequences is what hurts the most, it feels like their decisions and the damage is justified. Over time those feelings mostly faded, they do fade in time. I'm not going to say its quick, but they do fade. Now its just an occasional sting that comes and goes in the matter of a few seconds. Furthermore, I really don't mind if they end up successful and happy forever, it would actually be the best thing for my kids to avoid instability. Something that's helped put things into perspective recently was a quote, I forget where it comes from and its hard to grasp in the middle of those emotions, but it does help. Basically its "you wont feel this way forever". There's another similar one by Rikle "Let everything happen to you / Beauty and terror / Just keep going / No feeling is final".
What I'm learning is there is truth to this, no feeling is final nor will it last forever, good or bad. It helps me to accept some feelings, even if they hurt, because I know I'll survive them. Anyway, just wanted to let you know you aren't alone in those thoughts/feelings and hope you feel better.
Accept what is, let go of what was, and have faith in what will be
