That I had spent the majority of the last 12 years making her feel like garbage. This honestly isn't something new she has been saying that forever usually in moments of anger though. I have a control issue that I used to belittle my wife, it was not intentional but I realize how silly it was now. Being grumpy about her wearing make up, who she was spending time with, telling her what I thought things were stupid all the time. I pushed away many friends she tried to have. I ruined all kinds of moments with my negativity.
Any idea where your tendency to control came from? Since one of your topics was your dislike of her wearing makeup, perhaps insecurity? I know you say you changed overnight, but that's rare and your actions say the opposite--e.g., snatching her phone, begging, making her stay in your bedroom. You say you don't have a circle of friends. Mine is small and I began building it post-BD. The more you can make your life joyful and satisfying, the more attractive you will be to her, and the better your life regardless of outcome.
Originally Posted by Illidin
She has become very close to this girl and tells me even if we got back together she would want to fight to keep that friendship. I dont know how to feel about that.
Your old relationship is toast. Much later, if and when she's interested in a Relationship 2.0, that would be a fair question to ask--is her new lifestyle and circle of friends one you can accept or no?
Sorry you're going through all this craziness. An EA is of course wrong even if you weren't a perfect partner. Steve85' sitch has similarities (W sending pics) and he reconciled, so keep an eye out for him.
