people dont really get it what we are trying to do here they want to hear about the struggle, not all but some that dont want to here Im sending him the best and hope he is ok
There is nothing to say..I had no last words..no closure..and no contact for years except for a VM sort of apology..
sometimes it is sad but...I can tell you with no contact it was easier to let go after the initial few years If someone asks I still say I wish him the highest and best/...no resentment this way I cant create a story in my mind that creates continuous resentment and lifelong bitterness What do you want for you?peace or pain create your inner story for peace like Sometimes M dont work maybe some are not meant to be forever yes love hurts
It is not the loss that matters but what we learn from it and if we can forgive, love and let go
Whatever you think, whatever closure you give to this make sure it serves you for the good I mean..create a story in your mind that you can peacefully live with
We had a great M, a sweet child and great years Sometimes Relationships end I wish him the very best
repeat it every time soon it becomes the new truth and you get peace in time
married 14 years H 42 bomb 2/07 IDLYA D final 3 /09 M ow D ow
When my husband moved out it was excruciating. I felt so alone. And the worst part-I didn’t have the person who loved and supported me during challenging times, my H, to help me through it. I kept myself very busy. Focused on myself. Eventually, the new life felt relatively normal. I still have triggers. If I’m with other married couples, see my husbands car, hear his voice, a certain song. I can spiral. But the spin time becomes less and less. You have what’s most important. D3 and a healthy brain. Day by day you will get stronger. It will get better.
~j~VENTING~ It's morning time. Fighting to keep myself togethet. I CANNOT fall apart right now. I have to remind myself of what he's done. Ugh..that makes me well up. When I get really angry I cry.
FOCUS on ME. Celebrate freedom. A new chapter. I wish this pandemic wasn't happening! Makes my new found freedom hard. I feel like I'm treading water. I need to be on my back floating; relaxed. This is nk big deal. Right?
Ugh...he's awake. Trying to be super dad. Makes me sick. Gotta make a good lasting impression. He talked to D3 yesterday about leaving for work. She's fine, as it's a normal thing. I should follow her lead.
~Never Give Up ~ 2019 Mar BD June BD Dec Aow/xgf 2020 Jan he wants D Feb he flys2 ow Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn Apr he leaves for work until Nov Oct D FINAL 2020 Living MY Happiest Life Ever
Can you do that Can? Can you tell yourself that this is just him leaving for work for a long period of time as in the past. You don't know what the future holds. I doubt he does either. I can promise you from dealing with this situation for a very, very long time, that what they want changes every five minutes, there clearly is no fixed, permanent grand plan under which they operate, and things generally change after that first period of bliss and happiness. This is not permanent. How you feel about it is not permanent. Enjoy this last day (for a while) as a family.
Can you do that Can? Can you tell yourself that this is just him leaving for work for a long period of time as in the past. You don't know what the future holds. I doubt he does either. I can promise you from dealing with this situation for a very, very long time, that what they want changes every five minutes, there clearly is no fixed, permanent grand plan under which they operate, and things generally change after that first period of bliss and happiness. This is not permanent. How you feel about it is not permanent. Enjoy this last day (for a while) as a family.
Thank you OwnIt. For the moment, thinking like that may get me through the day. And no hyper focusing on "the moment".
~Never Give Up ~ 2019 Mar BD June BD Dec Aow/xgf 2020 Jan he wants D Feb he flys2 ow Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn Apr he leaves for work until Nov Oct D FINAL 2020 Living MY Happiest Life Ever
That, and remembering, if YOU don't make a big deal of him leaving D won't either. She will take her clues from you, so don't let it be a deal. And don't give hi the saitsfaction of seeing you sweat.
That, and remembering, if YOU don't make a big deal of him leaving D won't either. She will take her clues from you, so don't let it be a big deal. And don't give him the satisfaction of seeing you sweat.
Thank you kml. Luckily, D3 is use to her daddy working away for long periods. It's all she's ever know. And so true, don't make a big deal about it. Happy to say, he did not see me sweat today. I did lose it, was angry at times, but he did not see me.
~Never Give Up ~ 2019 Mar BD June BD Dec Aow/xgf 2020 Jan he wants D Feb he flys2 ow Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn Apr he leaves for work until Nov Oct D FINAL 2020 Living MY Happiest Life Ever
~j~ We made it. I can't believe I doubted myself, my strength, at getting through the day. Acting "as if", not making a big deal of the day, enjoying family time, is what WE did. We actually spent time together, for D3. My attitude for the day was kindness, and that really helped. But when I was alone, out of sight, I did lose my cool over a few silly things. I let myself feel & deal, then returned to kindness. It a nice day over all, until it was time to go.
00 left some of his packing until the last minute. He had said it all day too, "I'm not done... I'll get to it." Well, after a day of fun & sun & a few drinks, the packing wasn't happening. He wanted to hang out with D3. Then we all also strolled the neighborhood; he wanted to say goodbye to a few people. I mentioned the time and he finally snapped back to reality pretty quick. It was obvious that he was a bit tipsy at this point, so I helped him finish packing. Made him up a snack bag. He was getting emotional, then a bit mad like stomping teenager, not wanting to go to work. He was overwhelmed with the moment & having to travel during this time. Also, he will have to do a 14 day quarantine as soon as he lands, and then goes to work for up to 7 months. So I get him overindulging, as he'll have to go without for the entire season.
We hugged three times. Once while he was stressing out packing I felt he needed a hug & it was received. At the airport, he leaned into me for a goodbye hug, and a second one. He had talked to D3 a few times during the day about him working & she can call him whenever she wants. This is her normal. She is use to him being gone for work. 00 says he doesn't want to work as much but wants to give us a home.
Anyway. We made it through the day. And I'm SO tired right now....zzzzzzzz
~Never Give Up ~ 2019 Mar BD June BD Dec Aow/xgf 2020 Jan he wants D Feb he flys2 ow Mar returns stuck here C19 Lckdwn Apr he leaves for work until Nov Oct D FINAL 2020 Living MY Happiest Life Ever
