One other thought for you... letting go of all expectations is important, and releasing your belief that you'll get back together doesn't mean that you have to believe you won't. For me, though, it was also helpful to explore and research what *might* be so that I wasn't so afraid. Reading my divorce book, studying the finances, learning the law all helped me to be less scared about what life might be like as a divorced single mom. It kind of evens the playing field so as you look to the future and you see these various paths, you aren't looking at it like "reconciliation = good, divorce = bad and scary" but more like both paths have positives and negatives and you simply are letting go of your expectations about which direction you're headed. I'm not sure if that makes sense... but I guess I'm just saying that whatever you can do to also release the fear around the D path might also help with releasing expectations more generally about what may or may not happen in the future.
Hang in there. xx M
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
