KC - I know this is all very tough. Hang in there. There's a difference between letting go of the bike ride and not focusing on it internally vs. externally. You maybe didn't mention the bike ride for a week to him, but internally haven't let it go yet.
That's just it... when he rode off on the bike... I had written it completely off. Internally and externally.
Its when he brought it up all on his own days later about taking me on a bike ride that I thought maybe... and then frankly was confused by it. Would OW be okay with H taking his W on a bike ride??? It seemed weird.
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Why would this bike ride be enjoyable? It's more than likely not going to meet up to your expectations - not sure if it represents a bygone dream for you, or that it's easy to ignore the current situation and get away from it in a make believe world for a while, but ultimately it'd be a bike ride with your husband who has moved in with OW and wants to D. Sounds miserable. As far as the candy, I wouldn't read in to that.
It would be enjoyable in and of itself. The fact that he was wanting to spend some time with me? Seeing me as the W he used to love?
I know NOT to read into the candy thing, it just left me dumbstruck. Everything going on and you want to bring a tin of candy you bought with me in mind 6months ago? I would have just given the candy to someone else rather than driving 2 hr to return. Again, I know it means nothing.
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From the contact he does have with you, I agree with AS - sounds like he is just too lazy to get docs himself or do legwork himself, and realizes it's easier to get you to do stuff if he isn't being a jerk about it.
Yes, it was business. I suppose he thinks we are being friends... I get his paperwork and he says thank you 3 times in one afternoon - not typical to say thank you.
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The list of things that you are doing for you sounds great - don't lose focus on yourself by focusing on your H. What made you text him on Saturday, anyhow?
Honestly - I wanted him to be sincere about the bike ride. Honestly - I missed him (BUT WOULD NEVER TEXT THAT). He actually engaged me in conversation. He actually validated me in discussing my work meeting.
But, I know it was a stupid thing and probably set me back a bit and just screamed to him I'm still waiting on you.
I will not text him again unless I need to respond to something he texts to me.
Again, I have been a bit a Negative Nancy. So, I will say that in the last 10 days we are at emotional neutral. There hasn't been an angry exchange of anything in the last 10 days. So I will take and leave it there... walk away and keep working on myself.
