I have nothing but compassion for you but WTF does this even mean? What man backs down from spending time with his children? If it’s not to piss of the W then that’s exactly why they are in this situation in the first place.
Sometimes I’m ashamed to be a man.
One of my friends/mentors during this process has 3 kids and went through D about 6 years ago.
When he first D'ed, he agreed to 3 weekends out of 4. He worked FT in a demanding job, figured he got plenty of time with his kids on the weekends. Three years later, his XW came back wanting 100% custody. She accused him of abuse (making calls to CPS, etc.). He got a L who convinced him he should go for 50/50, which he never even wanted in the first place. He won, and now says it's the best thing he ever did.
He never would have gone for 50/50. He would have accepted his weekend role. I think many dads do this. Maybe I'm wrong. Definitely a generation ago, maybe not so much now.
And yes, you are right that I did a lot of stuff in the past to avoid pissing off my W. And that's partially why I'm here.
