Since I have been following your sitch, (which hasn’t been very long) you have made progress.
You’ve mentioned that you wish your H would have at least given you the opportunity to get your **** together. I have found that most people are more motivated to get it together, when they are faced with the loss of something important to them. The loss of a relationship, friendship, job, etc. It is pretty common across these forums and life in general. I’m guilty of it. No sweat. The time is right here, right now.
This is an analogy that I like to use myself. Look at how you invest your time, just like making investments into a bank account or stocks.
Right now, your best investment is going to be in yourself. You can’t go wrong by choosing that direction. You are making good deposits in the weight loss and knitting departments. What other areas do you want to improve on?(Diversify)
When you focus and invest so much time on your H in the present, it is a poor investment and it sucking up a valuable resource(your time). That account isn’t going to grow and you are being charged fees for bad deposits. It is negatively affecting your overall progress.
Invest so much time and effort into yourself, that you will quit looking at your H for his attention or validation. When you quit wondering what he is thinking or up to, then you’ll know that you are detached. You won’t have to wonder if you are detached, because you will just be living your great life and he will be lucky to be part of it.
There are no shortcuts to the other side. Only right through the swampy land of crap. You got this!!
Me:45 ExW:48 M:04/97 3 Bombs & 2 ReCons 1st BD 11/10 D Finalized 4/20 D-16 S-14 Going in one more round when you don't think you can. That's what makes all the difference in life.~Rocky Balboa
