Today was a struggle. I woke-up feeling sad, but was able to make it through the morning. I was hoping to ride the wave of grief for a few minutes and let it go. Unfortunately, it stuck with me for a few hours. I called my mother for some emotional support and it turned into an argument. She tells me to stop crying, I'm acting like a baby. I told her she has no idea what I'm going through because she's been married to the same man for 50 years.
Today my anger and disappointment is focused on my in-law and SIL. They all know what has happened and they haven't reached out to me or my daughter. It makes me so angry, and it hurts too. I've known them for 24 years and have made sacrifices to help them out during their own hardships and I don't even get a phone call, a text, NOTHING!!
Yesterday was NC with H. We work for the same organization so he reached out to me on skype about a repairman coming to the house this Friday. I gave him a simple reply. Then he tries to engage me in a conversation. I don't want to be his FRIEND. Maybe he does this to ease his own conscience. Who knows.....
My mood is better this evening. Maybe I needed a good cry. It's been a few days.
I'm going to start working out tomorrow. I think it will help release some of my anxiety and help me with my mood swings.
I hope everyone is taking care. Stay safe.
Me: 47 H: 45 T: 24 M:23 D23 BD #1 12/19: ILYBNILWY BD #2 2/20: I discovered H was having an affair with OW. (OW is 21 and lives in another country) Current R status: Separated.
