At this point, I just continue to DB and GAL. Detachment going well, to the point that I'm not even sure I'd like to save this M at this point. We retained a mediator in January. I have sent the info I was asked to send along, but to my knowledge, W has sent nothing in yet.
W continues to be chatty (no R talks). I just listen and validate. She seems to be paying more attention to the kids, too. She is still staying at her friend's house each night as well. Not sure how long I will continue on this course. Taking it one day at a time.
W casually says last week that she "missed some emails," including an email from "the mediator guy." He had sent us both an email about 3 weeks earlier, asking us for our financial info, etc. She asked me if I had sent in the info, and I matter-of-factly said, "Yes, I did" and went on my merry way.
Today she mentioned that she had to get her laptop back in working order because everyone needs her information from her business, like the "the tax guy" and "the mediator guy."
Things continue to be amicable between us. It won't change what I am doing, but I do wonder if if she is "testing me" with these types of statements, trying to get a reaction out of me.
I'm referring to her asking me if I sent info to the mediator. How would I react? Would I get angry, not answer her, etc. I believe she feels I will stay as plan B no matter what because she knows I do not want to break up the family and hurt my kids in any way. She's trying to figure out if I am still of that mind.
We have spoken so little about the actual D/D process since BD, I just find it bizarre.
I just think she’s low conflict so there’s no need to discuss it regularly. I also think the plan b statements get blow out of proportion. I think right now she’s convinced she’s doing the right thing. You are probably looking at 2-3 years before she comes to the realization she made a mistake. Pretty sure you won’t wait that long.
W will want to discuss “what to do about Easter.” Do I tell her I really don’t feel like faking the whole happy family thing, or do I just do brunch or something at the house so we can all be together for a while before she goes on her way again, etc.