Limbo over, now separated but in lockdown (part 3)

[Pommy99]

I think I have done pretty well this week in limiting contact with H. All contact made has been initiated by him - and there has been a LOT.

As predicted by AS earlier in this thread, H seems to be pursuing big time - calls, texts, hugs, even liking everything I post on FB etc.

On Weds night he dropped off the kids, I’d fed the birds and put the bin out (thanks May), but he came into the kitchen and I was totally upbeat and chatty . I remained on my bar stool when he said he was leaving but he walked across the kitchen and asked for a hug goodbye. He asked how I was and I said great, and he told me he felt really mixed up and confused (and that my perfume smelt nice). I tried to validate but all I could do was say oh dear that must be very...um ... confusing for you. And we just giggled about it. Next day...this is super weird...he messaged me first thing to say he’d seen a job advertised that he was interested in. It’s for the same company and the same location that I work. I mean WTF, why would he want to work in the same place as me?? I thought he’s either making excuses to contact me or he realises he’s been a complete knob over the last year with his city parallel life and want to work close to home. I had more texts and calls later that day which I did not respond to or pick up. We did however exchange txts late afternoon and he told me he was in a bad place. I suggested he call a friend rather than try and deal with it all on his own.

Today he sent an early message to say hi and asked if I was ok and if I feel I am in a better place now. I said I don’t want to get into this over text but would talk f2f if there was anything he wanted to know or ask me. So he replied to ask if we could talk over the weekend.

So...what does he want to talk about? I get the feeling he really thinks plan b is slipping away. I need to be careful not to get reeled in, let him think I am available, and then watch him disappear again.

I’ve been running through scenarios in my head. What if he says he wants to work things out? What if he says he loves me? What if...what if.... there’s also a part of me that thinks he might want to know that I AM in a better place so he can tell me he wants a D and not feel guilty. I don’t want to second guess him but I do want to be prepared.

For now I will continue to keep my distance and not put any expectations on the weekend talks. I honestly don’t think 3 weeks of separation is sufficient for either of us to make any big decisions. I’m just really interested in what he has to say though. We’ve played this pursuer-distancer game so many times before