it's been a while since I've checked in with you, but I think being true to yourself and your own needs and finding an appropriate and timely way to communicate them, and then living your boundary in response to whatever your H does next, is probably essential right now.
For you, it might look like this,
'I'm committed to making our marriage work and that means attending MC together and working towards you giving me full disclosure on your infidelity and us developing our sexual relationship. I'm making an appointment for us later this week.'
He will either go or not go. He'll either start being honest with you and himself, or he won't.
Given the situation with lockdown, your boundaries may look practically different, but perhaps putting a time-limit on it in your mind might help?
My H strung me along for a while early in our situation with a deadline by which time he said he'd be ready to work on our relationship. All it did was keep me as plan B, and keep him from actually having to make any changes or develop any self awareness. When the deadline passed, I moved into a strict 'going dark' mode - I accepted that whatever he said or didn't say, he wasn't actually ready to work on our relationship in a way that was meaningful or acceptable to me. I took concrete action which involved no longer inviting him into the house, no longer accepting or initiating any affection, ignoring any communication which wasn't necessary and about the kids, and living as if I was single in terms of my finances and plans for my work and future. It took - I think - about three months before he decided that actually, he was ready to put the effort in. And while it has by no means perfect, and I think we moved to living together too quickly, I am sure it was my living my boundaries and refusing to be in any form of relationship with someone who wasn't taking clear action to improve it, that turned our situation around.
What would living your boundaries look like in terms of concrete changes to your own behaviour?
