I think you may be projecting on the motorcycle. You are deep down afraid of him riding it with OW on it. In your mind as long as it is there, then he isn't "sharing" it with her. KC, that is a form of trying to control him, it, and the affair. You cannot.
Dropping the rope means letting him and all of his things go. Not caring what he is doing and who he is doing it with. Look, it is ok to struggle with this stuff. We all do. What you shouldn't do is be so focused on him and his stuff that you don't see light at the end of the emotional spiral tunnel. Keep advancing towards that light. Believe it or not one day you will emerge from that tunnel and even if he came begging back you'd tell him to kick rocks. That is your goal.
You've been doing better, but you still have a hold tight on that rope and on wanting to R with this lying cheater. I think deep down there is a part of you that is still in denial about his lying and cheating.
Repeat: He is a lying cheater. And doesn't deserve me!
You should be saying that to yourself over and over and over again. Until you believe it.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
