Yes, I definitely hear what you’re saying, and that’s why I decided to sit with my feelings for a bit. I think the action is considering taking is kind of like what is recommenced at the very beginning, directly after BD, basically saying “oh you’re in a rush to be done with this? Ok let me help you”.
I say this because after so much confusing behavior/mixed messages/admitted confusion and conflict from H, at this time he is expressing that he feels pressure and guilt related to me (although even he admits it’s by zero fault or action of mine). Directly post BD it’s advised to demonstrate that response, to remove pressure or the illusion of it, and to let the leaving spouse know you don’t intend to try to stop them. The way he’s talking, I get the sense that he feels that I’m somehow standing in his way, so I’m feeling like that’s what’s needed here, both for my own sake and for the sake of this situation or what’s left of it.
H will be here tomorrow evening to drop off D4. I’m thinking of giving him the last of his belongings (it’s only a few smallish things), and any remaining financial disclosure paper work. Part of me wants to include a note, but I know that isn’t advised.
