It doesn't sound morbid. This is an exceptionally difficult time for families where the relationships are unstrained - for those who are navigating more difficult territory, it's even worse than that. You are doing all you can. And like you say, your H loves his daughters and is doing what he can for them. Neither of you need to be perfect parents right now, or ever.
Do you think your daughter might be using these behaviours as a way of getting your H and you to talk to each other? I'm sure you've already thought of that too. It might be her last ditch attempt to force some kind of talk or accommodation between the two of you.
