You echo what so many of us here have said, thought, and gone through.
I devoured this board. I checked his phone records. I did internet searches to see if I could find out more about his secret life. The first one? Absolutely a life saver. The other two? Only hurted myself. Made me obsessive. Kept the wound gaping. Please take another route that doesn't go by her house. This is an action you take for you.
My journey through this ended up being a faith journey. And I have found joy and peace. My story is not over, but I am l joyful and peacful.
Ask you whys. Scream out loud. Cry, a lot. Be angry. All normal feelings, and part of the process. Don't fight it. Move through it.
The MLCr is searching, and running. Of course he had a connection with his OW. They all do. But they realize at some point that the connection didn't make the hurt go away. My H is still talking about running. Wants me to do it with him! Pack up, move elsewhere, and start fresh. They have to find out on their own that no matter what they do, or where they go, the demons will always be there unless they are released.
Give your H the space and time to do this.
Grace
"When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy." Psalm 94:19
