We had a long conversation and WW said she would do anything to come home. She gave me all the signs and she has been back a week now. I have been learning to trust. A lot of the problems with her conduct have gone or are significantly reduced. Transparent, sharing location and trying. She is different, treats me different and it's going ok. Through talking and R I feel we've finally got to the bottom of what the real problem has been all along now though: sex and physical intimacy.
Many years ago (before we were engaged) I had doubts about the relationship. I overcame those doubts and proposed and we subsequently got married. What the vocalising of those doubts did to W though was apparently to turn her off sexually and she has been struggling ever since. When the M went through a rough patch last year it tipped her over the edge which led to the A. I believe this to be the case from what else I know and it also explains a lot and reduces my fears substantially of OM which is really helpful to our R. It finally fits.
There could be a lot of psychological reasons for this (eg fear of abandonment because I was seemingly happy but contemplating the future at the time) but it seems we didn't properly deal with that back then and it has caused a rift in our relationship and M. W has mentioned this before but was never talked about properly. W is therefore not wanting to be physical (being true to how she feels), but says she wants to want it more than anything because everything else is perfect. I really believe her and think we've made some honest progress in the last few weeks. Any suggestions as to what to do now? She says she's still attracted, etc but just not interested in P. I've suggested a MC, and ordered MWD's sex starved book for some inspiration.
