MLC newbie

[Believe6]

I know time is on my side. Wondering what the vets here do to deal with the pain of the PA/EA. He says he felt a strong connection with her that he can't explain. Like the one we had at the beginning of our relationship. And that connection turned into this crazy physical attraction. I have been dealing with the images, triggers, flooding... learned to control it in the past month, but the three months before that was so hard. I still sometimes feel this terrible pain. I know I am not supposed to show anything. I am supposed to be detached and following Sandi's rules.

I have found that I have been stronger because of this, but sometimes, just having to be around him and the kids... well it hurts. I miss him. I miss my best friend. I miss him touching me. We used to always hold hands or sit together even if we weren't talking. ALWAYS. It's been so painful. But I am trying so very hard to be positive, upbeat, and the "roommate." Not the wife. Not the love of his life. Not his best friend... it hurts so much sometimes...