MLC newbie

[Believe6]

Thank you, Job! I'll have to look up HaWho. 18 to 24 months ago... He has been very unhappy/dissatisfied with his job and being trapped (remote worker) at home for over a decade. But 2 years ago, he really started complaining about it. Then 13 months ago his dad had a stroke and subsequently passed. He has completely given up the OW. Like I shared, I had been checking his phone, computer, tablet, etc. And although I don't do that now, I do have a tracker on his phone which is never out of his site and I can see where he goes and even what sites he visits and how much. I hate to say, I still check that daily.

The thing is, my H is very steady. Never has had highs or lows emotionally. This is why this is so very hard for him. He cries when he never has before. He can't explain what he is feeling and the pain and loneliness, which I can understand as I actually have and still do struggle with anxiety and mild depression. Nothing I am medicated for, but I know the symptoms and signs as I've seen enough IC to know.

I had been seeing a IC and will do so again. Because I've done so much of this throughout my life, I already know what i need to work on. I have been using Byron Katie's the Work to help me look at my stressful thoughts. I use EFT tapping to help manage my anxiety and emotional pain. I meditate, pray often, and come to various boards to help find answers.

Then on top of that, I am building my life goal list anew. Without him as the central figure... and I journal. I will do what you say and not argue, but rather listen and validate. I do not know what he is going through. Even if I did and felt I maybe went through a very mild case of this myself a few years back, I don't know what he is going through.

I guess it's all about learning to be patient with him and myself. Blessings.