Lots of time at home these days, so I saw your update right away
OMG you really did listen to Snow?! I'm SO pleased. That makes me really happy. She can certainly make you groove. Good for solo dance parties. I've tested it. :-D
Squash casserole sounds GOOD. If I could go to the store I would make that too. But I'm currently self-isolating in my apartment and working from home because I have a cold and no one wants to hear me cough in a public space. I fully respect that. Butternut squash casserole? Other?
I still hope you might change your "wants" to be even more positive-leaning and not against something negative. So instead of "stop feeling anxious and hurt" I wonder what you do want? Maybe you do want to feel joyful and hopeful? Engaged with life and happy? Content and peaceful? I think it's more of a visioning exercise to see yourself where you want to be - but not watch what you're trying to leave behind.
I love that not a single thing in this post was about your WAS. I like it!