Please help

[oceangrl]

Hi pharm, Sorry you are here, but there is lots of support here.

First of all, make sure you have the Divorce Remedy book by Michelle Weiner Davis. She addresses a lot of what you have dealt with. This book is for your eyes only, and not for your spouse. Do not mention it to them.

Go through all the threads listed in Cadet's welcome email and study them. There are so many gems there. These threads will help you to fight your natural instinct. Your instinct will tell you to pursue him, beg, plead, reason. These things are deadly. Stop doing them right now.

They will also advise you about how to get your own life, or GAL, which will address your point about losing yourself for the marriage. Work on your self first.

I know this is painful, scary, and hard. Keep posting here, and look at the other threads for good advice that can apply to your situation.