All sounds really positive, IMO. It very well may be that you have not processed some of the feelings you have about your mom and other things because of the trauma of the sitch with your H... and I wouldn't say that is worrisome, it is totally normal and to be expected. And maybe a sign that you can unclench just a bit inside and start to let some of those feelings out... I think it is a good thing, esp with a good IC to support you. It won't be easy but then what of this is?
I feel like the time on my own with H traveling is so helpful because I do have that space to just be myself (though I'm mostly just being myself with my H now too, because, well, F it... but TBH I'm sure I'm more capable of handling and being the calm collected version of myself because I have that outlet. Any way you can carve out time for yourself where you aren't necessarily out GALing with friends or whatever but just relaxing on your own and just BEING without worries about how it appears or doesn't appear?
Me (46) H (42) M:14 T:18, D9 & D11 4/19 - 12/19: series of escalating BDs 9/20 - present: R and piecing
