It has officially been one week since the BD. I'm starting to feel a little more like myself today. I'm finally over the flu. I went to IC on Friday, and although the counselor told me this was not my fault, I am still blaming myself. If I had just been a better wife, a better listener, paid more attention to his needs, etc.
H has not contacted me at all this week. The friend that his is staying with has told me that H is looking for an apartment. It feels so weird that I won't be in contact with this man who I have loved for 23 years. Not knowing where he is or what he is doing makes me anxious. Then again, did I really know what he was doing the past 2 years? No. He's a stranger. I also found out that he is planning on divorcing me. I guess he expects to get rid of me as fast as he can and ride off into the sunset with his child bride.
I go back to work tomorrow, which makes me a little anxious but also relieved to have something to take my mind off of this. Although no-one knows but close family and a friend, I feel embarrassed - "Hey, there's the woman who's husband left her for a 21 year old". I feel humiliated.
You are doing amazing for it only having been a week. Be kind to yourself, you are still in the shock phase. Just as everyone else has said, it will get better.
And you should not feel humiliated. HE should feel humiliated. Anyone who would think less of you when he is not the normal one, is not your friend anyway.
the best apology is changed behavior. *************** me: 45 h: 48 m: 23 T: 26 DD1:19 DD2:16 DS:11 BD1: PA for 2 yrs 08/2016 BD2: OW is one of my closest friends 12/2016 BD3: H wants a D 11/2019
