It could be the anti-depressants or any number of other factors on her end. The problem as a LBS is that we think we can figure out the problem and then fix it, to get our spouse back. I don't think the vets have seen a case yet where that works. Therapists themselves can't counsel their spouses back. The WW needs to want to come back on their own and seek their own help.
What's worked for some here is to identify their own problems and address them. Sometimes a WW/WAS sees this change and comes back, other times they are too far gone in their own issues. So many sitchs sound familiar....W had a troubled childhood, became avoidant in the M and left or had an affair. This is her problem to work through and its quite hard to not get involved.
I read somewhere that the more anxious we are, the more avoidant an avoidant spouse becomes. If you become more secure, she could return closer to baseline. If you become more secure whats more important is its better for you and the little one.
H37, W37 D4, S2 ILYBNILWY 9/19 BD 9/19 EA discovered 10/19 Currently in limbo, no D or S process initiated
