I\m sorry you're having such a hard day, Dilly. You have been doing all you can, and for such a long time. I'm so sorry your H is so unwell and incapable of being the partner you need and the father your kids deserve. You really deserve so much better. I wonder how much standing for your marriage is depriving you of happiness now. I guess you're wondering that too, and there's no easy answer but finding little ways to take steps forward sounds positive.
