what should a stander do, exactly?

[DnJ]

Hello G

I agree with job. Action speak louder than words.

And it is amazing how little their attention span becomes. Gnat-like. Really.

You have requested she forward her stubs to the mortgage company. Good. Leave it alone. If she texts back asking why (again) don’t respond. You’ve already told her why.

A lot of times for things like this, financial matters, names on bills, etc., they do not want to cooperate. Give an opportunity and then find a way to look after it yourself. You cannot count on her to follow through or keep her word. MLCer do lie and forget; so it could be non culpable - but that matters little, you would still need to take care of things.

I was trying to show detachment, in a way she would see. I felt like following up with how much I love her and wish she would come home, but thankfully I did not text anymore than that. surprisingly, she had no response at all.

I agree with you, it is good that you did not text anymore of your feelings.

G, you have made progress with detachment. Keep working on indifference.

I do understand and empathize with how much you love her and wish she would come home.

You are doing well my friend. An LBS’s progress is step by step, and takes time.

A suggestion for you. You need not “try” to show detachment. Do it. Be detached. It will show.

Focus on you.

Keep to your limited contact. And continue delaying responding for 24 to 48 hours. And then only to really important matters.

Did you block her on social media?

Stay strong.

DnJ