"what do we tell our friends, they'll ask?" (if in a situation when we were all invited to friend's)
Since some friends sense there's issues in our R and likely my oldest D does to - I'm a bit sensitive to how I may be portrayed in this sitch. These people don't know about her awful behavior, yet.
Why give someone who portrays you negatively, the responsibility and control of relaying your message? "I'll talk to D", "I already talked to D", "I'll talk to our friend", "I already talked to our friend." If in some case the message doesn't matter to you at all--she's like "What do I tell the Barista?", then just "Up to you. :)"
It is kinda important that your D feel comfortable with your comings and goings. When I go somewhere when my D is home, she knows how to reach me, and when I'll return. She often asks where I'm going.
