Wolfman....I think one thing you may want to look at out of all of this is why are you still so attached to this woman? Maybe you need to work some more on trying detach your emotions to the things she says and does.
As a father that just came through a rough patch with his own D, I feel your pain. As others have suggested, there are forces here that are beyond your control (OCD, depression, anxiety, and a less than ideal ex). Focus on what you can control. (Hint: It is you!)
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
