Can, nope, no Happy Anniversary. Just be very happy on that day and a little mysterious.
I thought you saw a lawyer who did the filing for you? Make sure not to agree to anything without running it by the attorney. I know you guys have some property that will have to be resolved, any retirement, child support, alimony if applicable, health insurance for D, life insurance to protect the payments you get, automobiles divvied up, custody, visitation, given her young age, I'd also think about what happens if one or both of you dies, would he get her or would someone else, etc. If there is a way to swing it (maybe house equity) KML always suggests prepayment of obligations since these folks tend to have job and solvency issues down the road.
Try not to leave yourself with restrictions (like you can't move without his permission, or can't travel with her, things like that). You can always be kinder than your decree if you want, but if it is in there you will be required to meet it. If you can get him to auto pay his commitments, that's good too. Maybe also try to put in there that he has to let you know within X days if he moves or changes jobs, and provide the name of the employer and his address and contact info (given his 00 status). Don't assume that the way he deals with you now is the way he deals with you forever. Just about all of them get nastier over time and disappear for at least a while.
Definitely follow his lead. You can tell him it isn't what you wanted, but that you are not standing in his way. Let him do the talking and don't commit to anything until you run it by your lawyer. You should have already had some discussions with the lawyer about what you will get, etc. Make sure you know the timing and what happens next, etc. I think the stronger you can be in that conversation, the better. Make him see that you accept it and are moving on. That is far more terrifying for them than someone who says "ok, I'll be waiting for you here forever."
Don't be afraid of getting a resolution done either. They are always nicer when they feel guilty. Later on you are just a pain in his butt and a hindrance to his happy life and he will complain about everything he pays you.
