Doing my thing and hope for the best

[may22]

My H (before he ended the A) told his mom that he thought I was strong and could handle this whereas he didn't know if AP could handle losing him. (She told me this.) VOMIT. Honestly, it is all stupid excuses they make up in their puny, confused minds. If it makes them feel better to think you're strong and can handle it, then that is the path they will take. I know of another WH who told his W the opposite, that she had no drive or ambition, he needed someone more his intellectual equal who would stand up to him. (Oh, and maybe it would help if she dressed a bit nicer around the house.)

Let's not make excuses for them. Yes, we are all strong, capable women. We don't need these men in our lives to raise successful children and be happy and make a positive difference in this world. We may *want* them, or want a version of them that isn't showing up right now, but we don't *need* them. And it truly doesn't matter how they justify their actions right now, in my view. Once (if) they come out of this fog, they'll have the opportunity to really better understand why they made the choices that they did and how they want to live their lives going forward. But for now, it is all just weak excuses. (That is what I think, anyway!!!) Tell your friend she's a bad-a$$ and her H is a $hit. Just like the rest of our clowns.

I'll add to Wayfarer-- you sound great. Keep up the good work!