He brought up the relationship, well, sort of. Sunday night he caught up to me while I was on a walk and eventually asked how I was doing with the divorce. I told him that I was processing but wasn't afraid anymore, that I was learning a lot, happy with who I am and how I feel, and that I had a lot to offer. Then I said your turn, and he talked about everything but the divorce. Hmmm. I didn't push it at all, and he has backed off a tiny bit since then. Still friendly, still communicating multiple times a day, all friendly, etc. I can tell he's holding back though, and I suspect that he's holding back his feelings on the divorce. Maybe he's processing some conflicting emotions. Oh, yes, he also commented on my upbeat attitude. I've had a drastic change, and I feel like my old self, which frankly has been years. I feel simply amazing. I told him that I'm really relieved and ecstatic, since we have been communicating and working together. I said that us co-parenting and managing things together is almost everything I've ever wanted all these years. (I did not verbalize this, but the almost is because we are not a romantic we at the moment.) Previously he was very passive and not involved with anything really but especially the nuts and bolts of parenting and running the household. He's done his own 180 on that. I thanked him for stepping up, and I look for opportunities to thank him in the moment.
Our oldest is turning 16, and we're having family over this Saturday to celebrate. I'm nervous but excited. Our families know that we are separated, and I know the ones coming don't want us to divorce. Hopefully no one makes it their business. I feel like this needs room to breathe and develop at its own pace. Both of us are quite stubborn and naturally kick back at any unwanted influence. Mostly I am excited to do more as a family.
